"You just need to relax"
Nothing that starts with “just” is ever good…
Infertility is a medical condition that affects millions of people worldwide. According to the World Health Organisation, infertility is a reproductive disease. Approximately 1 in 6 couples worldwide have infertility.
It can be incredibly painful, raw, and often lonely. And yet despite this, many people don’t understand what infertility is. And even worse, there’s still a stigma surrounding it. There absolutely needs to be greater awareness of what infertility is and how people can help those going through it.
During our infertility journey, I heard it all:
“You just need to relax” “You just need to think positive thoughts”
"You just need to stop trying"
"You just need to adopt" “You just need a holiday” Comments like these were always so upsetting and frustrating. Infertility is a reproductive disease. People would never make these comments about other medical conditions. Infertility should be no different.
“How can I best support you?”
For anyone who has a loved one with infertility, the best thing you can do is to recognise it’s a medical condition and to not offer any advice. Anyone going through infertility will get professional advice from the medical experts. You just need to be there for them, acknowledge their pain, and simply ask, “how can I best support you?”
My hope is that there comes a day soon though when people struggling with infertility will no longer suffer in silence and will no longer hear the words, “you just need to relax.”